How to Write Unmaintainable Code: 6 Steps (with Pictures).
How To Write Unmaintainable Code Ensure a job for life ;-) Roedy Green Canadian Mind Products Introduction Never ascribe to malice, that which can be explained by incompetence. - Napoleon In the interests of creating employment opportunities in the Java programming field, I am passing on these tips from the masters on how to write code that is so difficult to maintain, that the people who come.
How To Write Unmaintainable Code by Roedy Green is a classic text for all programmers. What appears to start out as simple humour, quickly reveals satire, farce and ultimately harsh judgement. If you’ve written much code, you’re likely to feel very seen. Unmaintainable code comes from five core practices: Naming: use single-letters, typos and a baby name book; Coding style: obfuscate.
In this tutorial I want to illustrate how to write unmaintainable code. By writing unmaintainable code you can make sure you will never get fired because you’ll be the only one capable of understanding what the code does, and most importantly why. Please note: this post is ironic. Assign weird, fantasy and casual names to your variables, functions and objects. There should be no correlation.
Write an extremely detailed design document that describes each step in a very complicated algorithm. The more detailed this document is, the better. The more detailed this document is, the better. In fact, the design doc should break the algorithm down into a hierarchy of structured steps, described in a hierarchy of auto-numbered individual paragraphs in the document.
To write unmaintainable code is a very unworthwhile thing to do, because you will be essentially married to the code until you find somebody to which you can explain it. Personally once I write some code I want it to be maintainable enough so other people can contibute for I can move on with other things.
Roedy Green's fine How To Write Unmaintainable Code has been widely cited all over the web since its original publication in 1997. Surely at least a mention of the author and date of the article could have made the front page, so that those of us who've already seen it multiple times could know to skip it? Share. twitter facebook linkedin. Unmaintainable employee (Score: 5, Insightful) by.
Write it for other people to read. This means a combination of good names, good comments, and simple statements. Once upon a time memory was scarce and cycles times were slow. programmers were encouraged to write complex single lines of code that did many things. Today memory is plentiful and cycle times are fast. You should write 5 lines of simple code people can follow instead of one line.
How To Write Unmaintainable Code In the interests of creating employment opportunities in the Java programming field, I am passing on these tips from the masters on how to write code that is so difficult to maintain, that the people who come after you will take years to make even the simplest changes. Further, if you follow all these rules religiously, you will even guarantee yourself a.
How To Write Unmaintainable Code. Introduction. Never ascribe to malice, that which can be explained by incompetence. Napoleon. Because of the slashdot plug, hits peaked at 250 a second on this page, and the hit counters stopped kicking over. I am also getting a slew of email with suggestions for ever more subtle techniques of writing unmaintainable code. It will take a while for me to get.
Recently I saw a humorous guide on GitHub titled, How To Write Unmaintainable Code. GitHub is primarily a repository for open source software, and therefore serves as a bastion for programmer humor. The author of the guide is claiming to be “passing on these tips from the masters on how to write code that is so difficult to maintain, that the people who come after you will take years to make.
A classic. But nowadays, we use XML, frameworks, and many layers of web, SOAP, SOA, WSDL, BPM to write unmaintainable code.
How to Write Unmaintainable Code is a satirical piece of programming advice written by Roedy Green a long time ago. That it remains his most popular essay till date speaks volumes about the programming skills of human society as a whole. Collectively, we are either a massive bunch of shit-chucking apes who take this essay seriously, or a small bunch of highly skilled developers seeking relief.
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